I will forever be grateful for this amazing experience. I feel incredibly blessed to be studying abroad and learning from a new lens, but I have to admit, at times, it is hard being away from home. I miss my amazing, loving parents and sun-shiny sister so, so much, even though our family group chat is almost always going off. I miss my friends, terribly, even though the same is usually happening in our various social media group chats.
I miss the little things I didn’t think I’d miss like late night Meijer runs, and the specific scent of laundry done in my house.
Through what I’ve been missing, I’ve also learned that FOMO is extremely, excruciatingly real. The oddly contradictory feeling of wanting to be back home desperately and also being terrified of being back home is… well scary. A range of thoughts like “will my residents like me after I randomly show back up?,” “will my dog Pickles remember me now that I haven’t seen her in months??,” will I remember how to drive my car!?!?” are admittedly somewhat ridiculous, but also very valid in times of homesickness.
It’s really odd being away and seeing so much happen without me. Hope is changing. Holland is changing. The students I knew as freshman are older, wiser, and so much stronger! And my only way to experience it for now is through my phone, either on Instagram stories or scrolling over GroupMe chats that occurred as I slept thanks to the 5-hour time difference.
I feel like I’ve probably also changed. I’ll definitely feel more comfortable cooking meals in the Scott basement, but I also have a more worldly repertoire of sociolinguistics. I feel more confident in my abilities and knowledge.
I’m not sure if this was comprehensible, but I miss all my loved ones and I can’t wait to be this new me back home.