Taking Things My Philosophy Professor Says Out of Context

This is not meant to discredit my philosophy teacher in any way but rather commend his unconventional teaching habits; his weird phrases often stick to my mind and help me remember the material. The post’s purpose is a good laugh so enjoy!

Based on a true story.

Oh cow, why are you so beautiful. Is it because you have reached actuality?

Out of Context: “Take the cow. A nice, beautiful cow.”

In Context: According to Aristotle, all things in nature try to achieve actuality, their final form. Take the cow. A nice, beautiful cow. A calf has the potential to become a cow, and therefore strives to become a cow, which is its species’ final form.


 

When He crowed, the Light entered the Universe.

Out of Context: “God is the Chicken of the Universe.”

In Context: Concerning the infamous dilemma “Which came first: the chicken or the egg,” Aristotle would argue that the chicken in the form of a purely sentient “god” not only came first but had always existed. His existence propels the universe around him to move, thereby birthing eggs. In this sense, God is the Chick of the Universe.


 

“Euuh!”

Out of Context: “I think the cabbage would scream in French.”

In Context: There are three types of souls: the vegetative soul, the animalistic soul, and the human soul. Aristotle teaches that what differentiates humans and animals from vegetables is the fact that we can feel pain and emotions. On a side note, if a cabbage felt pain, I think the cabbage would scream in French. I’m not sure why.


 

For the sake of the three souls, we live off of candy!

Out of Context: “If we could just live on a diet of cotton candy.”

In Context: (Continuing off of the last one) If vegetative souls could in fact feel pain, all the vegans would be at a crossroads. If we could just live on a diet of cotton candy…

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