I’m sitting in the library at a table on the first floor near the Cup and Chaucer by myself, and I might be alone, but I’m not lonely. The rain is falling against the window, quietly, but it’s just loud enough for background noise. A girl across the room keeps shouting, “Want to take a survey for free candy?” to everyone who walks in the door and in return, every person who walks past her says, “No.” She keeps glancing at me, and I keep looking away when our eyes meet by accident. I’m avoiding it, because I have “better things to do,” such as scroll through my Facebook timeline.
And I’m laughing now, because “better things to do” was a concept that made sense in my mind, but after writing it down, it’s completely absurd. Do you ever do that? Think about something, maybe overthink it so much in your head that when it finally strikes reality it becomes absolute nonsense? I realized something important.
Maybe my sight is too narrow.
There comes a time where there’s so much going around us that we become immune to our surroundings. Maybe it’s because our brain is talking too much or we want to remain under the radar or we’re too busy being the center of attention of a different situation. We operate on our own tracks, like trains, never crossing into unknown territory. The worst part is that I don’t think I’m really afraid; it’s more the fact that I never considered off-roading in the first place. It’s more ignorance than it is a lack of courage.
I guess that’s why they call it a “train of thought,” too. Because it has a tendency to go in one direction until it reaches the end. I wonder if I could change that, even a little, to create a path with many trails rather than to stick to what I know to be solid ground.
How are you stepping out of your comfort zone? Tweet at me @hopesophie17. Questions about Hope? Other comments you may have? Feel free to post below or email me at sophie.guetzko@hope.edu.